Day 9

Feeling much better after some medicine changes. Ever since I had two of the drains removed, the pain has eased up, though I still find myself near tears first thing in the morning. I was told today that I really need to take it easy. I'm super stubborn, if you couldn't tell from my previous blog posts. 

I like to do everything myself. I like to make sure my kids are spoiled, full of snacks, and extra happy. 

I absolutely have over done it. I'm working on trying not to be so overbearing, so stubborn, and so unwilling to let others help me. 

Truth is, I do need help. I do need people to help me do a lot of things. I need my husband to keep track of my medicine because its making me forgetful. I need help opening the car door and getting the seatbelt on. I need help having my body wiped down. I need help putting the ointment on my incisions because I get nauseous when I do it myself (even though I think they are so cool). 

I hate admitting that I cannot do it all. It's hard for me to see little itty bitty things that need to be fixed, and I don't want to sound like a jerk when I tell someone that they aren't doing what my children prefer. I don't like to bother anyone. I'm independent and I do not like to ask for help. 

If you know someone like me, and they are going through something similar...don't ask what you can do for them, they won't answer you. Just do what you think you can, chances are, it will mean more than you know. 

So, now that company is gone, my husband and I had the conversation about my overdoing it and he begged me to just "sit down". For him, and my children, I'll finally listen....but it won't be for long. I'll be back to me in no time. For now, I'll rest.